Let’s Talk About Languishing—and How to Move Through It
Have you ever had one of those days (or weeks… or months) where you’re not exactly depressed, but you’re definitely not feeling like you are thriving, enthusiastic, or have a zest for life? You’re not sad, but you’re not happy. You’re just… blah. If you’ve been floating in that gray space, there’s a word for it—and it might help more than you think.
It’s called languishing.
So, What Is Languishing?
Languishing is that in-between state where you're not doing terribly, but you're also not doing great. Some psychologist have described this state as the “neglected middle child of mental health.” You're not burnt out, you're not clinically depressed, but you're just kind of… going through the motions.
You might find it hard to concentrate. You feel aimless, unmotivated, maybe even a little numb. You’re functioning, but joy feels muted. It's like your spark got dimmed, and you’re not sure when or how it happened.
And the thing is—so many people experience this. Especially after big life disruptions, long periods of uncertainty, or extended stress (you know things like, a global pandemic, times of economic uncertainty, horrific news and images livestreamed to us every day and the resulting feelings of helplessness, and the newest “unprecedented times”… you know for example. ).
How Can You Tell If You’re Languishing?
Here are a few signs that might ring a bell:
You’re feeling unmotivated even to do things you used to enjoy.
Your days blur together—wake up, work, scroll, sleep, repeat.
You’re emotionally flat—no major highs, but no major lows either.
You’re procrastinating more than usual and find it hard to focus.
You don’t feel “bad,” but you also don’t feel “good.”
If you’re thinking “that sounds familiar” right now, you’re not alone. Languishing is more common than most people talk about. The good news is, there are things you can do to move through it.
Approaches to Work Through Languishing
Here’s the key: you don’t need to radically overhaul your life. But small shifts in routine, mindset, and habits can begin to restore your energy and direction.
1. Name It
Sometimes the biggest relief comes from simply naming what you’re feeling. Giving something a label helps reduce the shame or confusion around it. You’re not lazy or ungrateful—you’re languishing. That acknowledgment alone can create space for self-compassion and action.
2. Create Small Goals (Even Tiny Ones)
Languishing saps motivation, so big goals can feel overwhelming. Instead, think small stems to move from inertia and move progressively to bigger ones, all the while allowing yourself to savor the feeling of accomplishments and momentum build with each step taken. Here are a few examples of first steps you can take:
🌱 Body & Movement
Stretch for 2 minutes after waking up.
Step outside and take 5 deep breaths.
Do 5 pushups, squats, or jumping jacks—just to move.
Walk around the block or to the end of your street.
🧠 Mind & Focus
Write down 3 things you’re grateful for (even tiny ones like “good coffee”).
Read one page of a book—just one.
Set a 5-minute timer and tidy one small area (a drawer, your desk, your browser tabs).
Choose one thing to remove from your to-do list (yes, subtraction counts).
🏡 Environment
Make your bed.
Open a window and let in fresh air.
Light a candle or diffuse an essential oil.
Put one dish away. Just one.
💬 Social & Emotional
Text a friend “thinking of you.”
Comment something kind on someone’s post.
Write a note to your future self (it can just be one sentence).
Give someone a compliment—even a stranger.
🌙 End-of-Day
Put your phone in another room for 30 minutes before bed.
Wash your face and brush your teeth (yes, these count!).
Reflect on one good or neutral thing that happened today.
Choose your outfit for tomorrow.
These are “wins” your brain can register—and that momentum can build. Sometimes, the smallest steps are the most powerful.
The key is achievability. If your brain says, “that’s too small to matter,” you’re probably on the right track. Start there. These tiny wins stack up—and they slowly reignite your energy.
3. Find “Flow” Moments
A flow moment is that sweet spot when you’re completely immersed in an activity—so focused, so engaged, that you lose track of time. It’s often described as being “in the zone.”
You're not overthinking or distracted. You’re just present. There’s a sense of effortlessness, even if the task is challenging. It’s not about the outcome—it's about how absorbed you are in the process.
And here’s the important part: flow feels good. It can boost your mood, restore energy, and give you a break from the mental fog of languishing.
Flow is deeply satisfying and it’s a powerful antidote to languishing. It’s not about producing something impressive or “productive.” The goal is to reconnect with your attention, feel engaged, and give your brain a chance to light up again.
Even 10–20 minutes of flow can break the monotony of languishing and remind you: I’m still here. I can still feel things.
Here’s a quick prompt to help you start:
👉 What’s one thing you used to do as a kid, teen, or in college that made you lose track of time?
4. Protect Your Time and Attention
Languishing loves distraction. Doomscrolling and endless passive content might feel like a mental escape, but often they leave you feeling even more drained.
Let’s face it: social media isn’t all bad. There is so much to worry about these days and social media can be a powerful tool if wielded wisely. It allows for us to engage in connection, learning, community building and organizing, and staying informed. But without clear boundaries, it easily becomes a mental and emotional drain—especially during times of uncertainty, unrest, or personal burnout.
The goal isn’t to block out the world or pretend everything is fine. It’s to stay grounded enough that you can engage with the world in a meaningful, sustainable way—without losing yourself to overwhelm or numbness.
You can care deeply about what’s happening and still protect your peace.
You can be informed without being consumed.
You can opt out of the scroll—and still show up when it matters.
That’s not ignorance. That’s wisdom.
Your attention is one of your most valuable mental health resources. In the middle of languishing, it’s easy to lose it to noise, doom, and distraction. But every minute you protect—every scroll you don’t do—is a small win for your well-being.
Even if you just start by reclaiming 10 minutes a day from doomscrolling, that’s 10 more minutes of mental breathing room. And when your mind has space, it can start to remember what it feels like to be present again.
5. Talk About It
You’re not the only one feeling this way—and sometimes, just saying that out loud helps. Whether it’s a friend, partner, therapist, or online community, connection can be a powerful antidote to emotional stagnation.
6. Reintroduce Joy (Without Pressure)
Don’t force yourself to be ecstatic or hyperproductive. Instead, ask yourself: what’s one small thing that brings me a little lightness? It could be baking cookies, playing with a pet, or watching a ridiculous comedy. Joy doesn’t have to be big to be real.
A Gentle Reminder
Languishing doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you’ve been surviving. And that’s something to honor. You’ve made it through a lot, even if your energy or motivation is low. It’s okay to move slowly. You don’t have to be at 100% to start healing.
You don’t need to fix yourself—you just need a little care, a little clarity, and a little courage to take the next small step.
You’re not stuck. You’re just in a quiet part of the story. And it’s okay to take your time finding your way forward.
